A B-52 Is Not Just An Airplane

I just had a 35 year flashback! I glanced up and saw 3 bottles (Kahlua, Baileys Irish Cream, and Grand Marnier) in my liquor cabinet and I was transported back to the late 1980's and Shirley's Spirit of Foolishness, an infamous bar on Captiva Island. Before me was a cork lined bar tray with 25 B52's and they weren't the airplane but the above pictured layered shot. I started to sweat. My body had a slight tremor and I was experiencing a bit of anxiety. No, that's a lie. I was completely trashed and felt nothing. I smiled and reached for the closest one. Yes, just one more (famous last words). 

You are asking yourself, "How did this happen?" At least I hope you are and don't consider this (25 shots on a bar tray) a normal occurrence. It's a complicated story. At this time I, with my wife Sherrill, owned a restaurant on Captiva called The Greenhouse. It was a small 50 seat white tablecloth restaurant serving a limited menu of contemporary American cuisine. Because we were on an island in the Gulf of Mexico, we focused on seafood but we also had lamb, duck, veal and beef. Our menu changed weekly. I was the Chef and Sherrill ran the "front of the house". We had a small hard working crew and at the end of season, Sherrill and I liked to reward them with a special treat. This year, we rented a stretch limousine and took everyone to Ft. Meyers for a food and wine extravaganza. It was to be a progressive dinner. There were about 8 of us. No drunk driving for this crew. We hit several spots and tried to consume all their champagne, not sparkling wine but true champagne. We accomplished this in a couple of the spots.

The first was a wings establishment for appetizers. They advertised the "Ultimate Wings" which was 20 wings and a bottle of Dom Perignon for $100. I think it was a Hooters but I'm not sure. My memory is a bit fuzzy. I don't know if it's because of age or the amount of alcohol consumption that night. We managed to exhaust their supply of champagne after 3 orders. 

This is where, things get sort of real fuzzy for me, because we had consumed a few bottles of wine (red, white, and Champagne) on the trip into Ft. Meyers. I know we continued to a few other restaurants eating and drinking our way through their menus. I remember ending up in a comedy club. After we drank all their Champagne (Which was only 2 bottles), we made the decision to switch from Champagne to B52 shots, a big mistake but not considered so at the time.      

We moved on to a dancing spot and engaged in more B52 consumption. This whole time our driver was perfect. It was like he was psychic. He had the car waiting right outside the front door at every spot we went to, right as we exited. He knew the location of the next spot as soon as one of us mentioned it and got us there quickly, dropping us off right at the front door. He was amazing.

The dancing spot was at Punta Rassa and it was approaching midnight. We had been drinking for about six hours. After a bit, someone decided it was time to go home, most probably Sherrill. She was the only sane one at this juncture. Our driver quickly had us on our way. We dropped some of our crew off along the way to our house on Captiva. We still ended up with about five people at our house. The driver helped us out of the car and even walked the dog because no one was in any condition to do it. I paid him in cash and grossly over-tipped him as drunk people always do. After someone suggested we resume our drinking at Shirley's Spirit of Foolishness, he offered to drive us free of charge and wait for us. I thanked him but told him that wouldn't be necessary. It was only a couple blocks and this was a small island, so they were small blocks. He left and some of us stumbled on down to Shirley's. Sherrill wisely chose to go to bed. I should have. 

During the course of our B52 escapade, one of us instituted a hand gesture to indicate our desire for another B52. It consisted of using the left hand to show five fingers and the right to indicate two, a 5 and a 2. Simple, right? In our inebriated state, it was much more effective than slurring the words. We all adopted it. When we arrived at Shirley's, John, my stepson and cooking accomplice, asked what we wanted to drink. Of course, I replied with a rapid succession of fives and twos. They were so rapid that they got to be a bit confusing. Two of us managed to start a mangled game of 8 ball. The next thing I know, I look up and there is John with that tray of 25 B52's. 

This being Shirley's, they were in plastic sauce cups not the glass shot conveyors we had previously been using. I will give them credit though, they were perfectly layered. There were four of our crew left drinking but I'm sure we didn't drink all 25. I'm sure we gave away the majority of them, at least I think we did. This goes back to the fuzzy part of my memory. I do know for sure that we didn't leave until that tray was empty. 

The next morning (actually later that same morning), I miraculously awoke in my own bed. As I moved about, I found bodies in unusual places. Luckily everyone was still alive, in pain but alive. We moved quickly to Capt'n Al's at South Seas Plantation for some breakfast (Brunch?) and their famous life saving Bloody Marys. 

Nowadays, I get that aforementioned feeling (I started to sweat. My body had a slight tremor and I was experiencing a bit of anxiety) every time I see a B52. I wonder why? 

3/4 Ounce Kahlua

3/4 Ounce Bailey's Irish Cream

3/4 Ounce Grand Marnier 

• Add the Kahlua to a glass or shot glass. Slowly add Irish cream by pouring it over the back of a spoon. Slowly add the Grand Marnier over the back of spoon, allowing it to layer on top.